Smart, handsome guy across the table.
You're laughing. You're enjoying yourself. You're connecting.
The date is going really well.
And then, you think, "SHOOT. What am I going to eat?"
You realize the menu basically only has burgers, salads, and an uber expensive entree and you're not sure who is going to pay.
You think, "I SHOULD eat a salad but then he'll think I'm a bird.If I get the burger, will he think that I don't take care of myself? And if I get the entree, maybe he'll think I'm assuming he's paying and I think money is important"
Yeeesh!!!!!!!!!! Look, I'm not going to say definitively that guys don't worry about this in the same way that women do. I'm saying that more women might relate to this story.
This scene demonstrates the unique relationship a lot of women have with food. Food is fraught with anxiety.
Because most women are objectified in media today, many women learn to self-objectify. Self-objectification leads you down this rabbit hole. During a date, especially a heteronormative one, the female is the object of desire.
As Gloria Steinam once said, "A pedestal is as much a prison as any small, confined space."
In the first date scenario, the woman feels evaluated on this simple task of eating. External validation and approval from this guy seems important and our heroine seems pretty helpless.
You may start to notice a theme in these blog posts.:
Ladies, ladies, ladies, YOU ARE ENOUGH.
If this guy cares that you're craving a salad, a burger, or a filet mignon and is disappointed in whatever meal choice you're making, he's not good enough for you. Nobody should be evaluating you on what food you decide to eat on any given night of the week.
So, eat what you want. Do you. And then, maybe even offer to pick up the check.