A weekly blog about how to quit dieting for good using an intuitive eating and health at every size approach.
The holidays have officially arrived.
Which means, as we discussed last week, that holiday weight gain talk has returned as well.
I'm happy to say this isn't Phenomenal Jane's first holiday season. So, we've got you covered with content.
Take a walk down memory lane and read some of the posts from the past! No ghosts but I do know there are a few Christmas Carol references.
Two weeks ago, I talked about how I got "tricked"into buying a gym membership during the holidays.
I"ve also talked about motivation for going to the gym. If your goal is weight loss, you're just not likely to go. That's behavioral psychology, bitches.
Hey, the holidays can be a great time to hit the gym. It's an awesome way to get away if you're having a frustrating time. It's something to do when you're feeling lonely or stir-crazy. Exercise also releases endorphins. It's literally a way to feel better if you're angry about how your Aunt burned the Brussels sprouts.
BUT........Thanksgiving is just one of those times when it's too easy for trainers to talk about "burning off" your food. It's just a hot mess of "fat talk" and "preventing weight gain."
In case you are feeling anxious about the Black Friday gym rush, here are some reasons that you can take a break.
1. Gyms make money off you not going.
In 2014, All Things Considered revealed how gyms need the people who don't go to subsidize people who do. For example, Planet Fitness has 6500 members, but if all 6500 of those members actually showed up, they would likely be breaking fire code.
If you're not likely to go anyway, subsidize your self-care, not the diet industry.
2. Built-in breaks are good for you.
My old swim coach used to say that you could ramp up your training for up to 12 weeks. After that, however, you might be hurting yourself rather than helping.
Since this was over a decade ago, the best source I could find to corroborate this was livestrong.com. Bodybuilders do what they call a "deloading week." This actually enhances their performance.
Maybe Thanksgiving & Christmas could be your "deloading" weeks.
3. Health is not just about EXERCISE.
Arianna Huffington wrote a whole book about this. In her book Thrive (and on other places on the internet) she explains the importance of rest. She points out that Americans leave "175 million vacation days unused." She writes, "61 percent of Americans confess to working while on vacation."
Not only are Americans not taking their vacation, but they're also working on vacation. And vacations are good for you.
Sleep and rest and love and family are good for you, too. So, if your gym routine is getting in the way of those healthy pieces of your life, it's okay to skip it.
4. Diet and exercise are not preventing weight gain in the long run.
People often talk about spiraling out of control whenever they're off their normal "routine."
Weight gain after periods of "routine" might be a signal that you are restricting too much. There's actually more correlation between dieting and weight gain than dieting and weight loss.
5. If you're not restricting, set point theory will protect you from ballooning.
Genetics play a big role in determining your weight. You might have noticed that your weight doesn't fluctuate too much even when you diet. I know I've gained and lost the same pounds over and over again.
I've talked about set point theory a lot.
But if you still don't believe me, listen to this scientist explain it.
Set point theory means that your body has a certain weight it wants to be at. If you eat extra stuffing, your set point will keep your body at homeostasis within a certain range.
6. Gaining a little weight might keep you warm in the winter.
If you're into seasonal foods, why not be into seasonal weight gain? Our ancestors wanted a little extra to keep them warm during cold winter cave nights. Winter foods tend to be heavier. They tend to be more "caloric" and lower in fiber. You might even find yourself craving something with extra fat when it's a really cold day.
If you were a caveman living in Scandinavia, you'd be hella grateful for that extra turkey fat. Maybe you can save a little money on not buying cashmere this year.
7. WHO CARES IF YOU GAIN WEIGHT?
I can't emphasize this enough. Your weight is not an indicator of health.
So what if you're not getting swipes to the right because you gained a free sweater's worth of weight? That person doesn't understand economics and they're shallow.
So, put on your sweater, skip the guilt, and skip the gym if you want to.
Enjoy your Thanksgiving!
I had originally planned a different post for this week. On election day, I was writing out all the reasons why you could skip the gym over the holidays. (Don't worry! This post is coming to you next week.)
I woke up Wednesday morning filled with dread and doom. I imagined some kind of apocalyptic future. Will American refugees flee to places where it feels safer to be ourselves?
The election of Donald Trump confirms a real human fear of mine. It makes me feel like hate is popular: sexism, racism, xenophobia, queerphobia, transphobia, ableism.
This fear has often made me feel isolated, like I'm not supposed to be here, like I don't belong on this planet. There's a great scene in the show, Happyish with Steve Coogan. He describes a general feeling like he's an alien marooned on Earth. This planet doesn't share his values. I often feel that way: like I'm waiting for the mothership.
And the body positive movement is an alien idea.
What is currently popular in our culture is dieting. It's being thin. It's being "sexy." It's making sure you don't have too much hair on your pussy. It's making sure your voice isn't too high or too low. It's being "likeable." It's fitting into all these impossible norms. You can't be too nice - you're a pushover. You can't be too mean - you're a bitch. If you're young, they don't take you seriously. If you're old, you're past your prime. If you're in between, you're probably going to have kids soon. So, you're not really worth the investment.
Here's the worst part: we actually believe that these impossible norms are attainable.
For the women who are fat, they should work hard to be skinny (even though diets don't work). We give women advice like "lean in" or "be more humble." We second-guess and rationalize that women are somehow responsible for their position. If we could just stop saying "like" so damn much, we might actually have equality.
But that is a lie. The real problem is not your pantsuit. It is the patriarchy.
Hillary Clinton won the popular vote by a very very slim margin. But, actually, FUCK BEING POPULAR. Fuck trying to attain what is unattainable. Let's stop trying to fit the mold. Because we never will.
Just like the 90s afterschool specials taught us, being popular is often not all it's cracked up to be. Being popular doesn't make you good or right. In fact, Billy Madison taught us that being popular makes you the villain.
I understand that it's easier to grow weeds than it is to grow a rose. I know that in the current culture, dandelions often fare better. In this election, the sexist white man did better. He had all the nutrients he needed to thrive.
It's easy to grow dandelions.
But, I have a problem with a field so full of weeds that we can't grow anything else. We can't grow tomatoes. We can't grow roses. In the context of this election, we couldn't grow feminism or equality.
Instead of trying to figure out how to grow dandelions, let's grow something else.
Please please please keep being who you are. Please please please keep being brave. Please please please don't let the weeds or the president prevent you from being the beautiful person that you are.
I hope you all had a happy and haunting Halloween.
Speaking of Halloween hauntings, the upcoming holidays that follow Halloween often spook us.
A candy overload on Halloween leads into a turkey explosion on Thanksgiving. We latke and Christmas cookie our way into a Chrismahakwanzakah feast. Just in case that wasn't enough, we top it all off with a night of drinking champagne before we ring in the new year.
Once we finish wearing sexy ghost costumes, our "healthy lifestyles" fly into a tailspin.
It doesn't help that everybody is repeating this too. I swear every local news story covers "holiday weight gain." It's usually right after they show you the "best" cranberry sauce recipe.
When I was more disordered, this dread of food that I was going to lose control over was extremely intense.
I remember one New York Sports Club (NYSC) advertisement that was scarier to me than any zombie. I can't remember the exact words. It made it sound like failing to join their gym was sealing your fate for holiday weight gain.
Frankly, it was brilliant advertising. It hit me in all the right places. It tapped into my innate fear at the time (gaining weight). It made me want to do something about it (join a gym). More than anything, it celebrated the most eating disordered thought:
"I'm going to be better than everyone else."
That's fucked up, right? Well, it's at the heart of a lot of eating disorders. It's part of the reason that you can't hear it when people say, "Don't worry about it. I'm eating the apple pie."
Iliza Shlesinger talks about this in her comedy special on Netflix. She says, "It's not enough to be skinny is it? It's not enough to be thin. You have to be the thinnest out of your friends."
So, when your sweet and loving friend offers you a slice of pie, you think. "Well, sure you look good. But, I want to be thinner."
I'm pretty sure I bought a NYSC membership that year. And that sucks.
Not just because they messed up my credit card on file (I ended up overpaying for my 3 months of membership). It sucks because people shouldn't be afraid of gaining weight (especially during the winter). People shouldn't want to be better than other people.
If you want to go to the gym, that's fine. If you don't want to go to the gym, that's fine.
I was traveling this week. So, I didn't exactly have time to perfect all my latest thoughts on body positivity.
Some pups, some koalas, and some cockatoos did though. ; )
In the meantime, I wanted to show you what I've been up to lately.
Check out this Instagram page and share it with your friends.
Next week, I'll be back with more musings on how to quit dieting.
